A Tale of Two Quizzes and The Bernie Generation

The original World's Smallest Political Quiz was designed by David Nolan. It consist of ten short questions, which you can answer 'Agree', 'Maybe', or 'Disagree'. 

An example would be, "Government should not censor speech, press, media, or internet." 

The resultant score correlates to a compass, denoting Left, Right, Authoritarian, or Libertarian. Anyway, a complaint I've heard lodged by a few leftists was that it was "too slanted". By that, of course, they meant "too libertarian". Given that the choices are binary, as well as having a moderate option, the claim doesn't hold up to scrutiny. Their real qualm is that they don't like being called authoritarians.

The truth of the matter is that both parties, yes, even friendly Bernie Sanders, are authoritarian, and largely to the same degree. Plot any politician's stance on the Nolan Chart, and that's apparent. Which leads us to this abomination. This is what is current being used to gauge one's political ideology:


https://www.politicalcompass.org/test

"The enemy of my enemy is my friend."

Seriously. That's a question presented.

"Our race has many superior qualities, compared with other races."

Erm, what? Crikey. I was trying to finish the quiz to get a screenshot of my results, but I had to stop. It's nauseating. This is the equivalent of some trash app passed around on Facebook. Except it's not a joke, it's what young people are using to self identify. Libertarianism is now 'right libertarianism'. If you look more closely, however, something more sinister becomes apparent. This quiz reads like a psychotic government's wish list. Fuck the census. It gets right down to the heart of the matter. How'd you like this information on each citizen?

"Military action that defies international law is sometimes justified."

"I'd always support my country, whether it was right or wrong."

At best, this is feeble sophistry. At worst, it's an ocean of millennial lemmings being led away from the very concept of liberty. 

" "From each according to his ability, to each according to his need" is a fundamentally good idea.""

Mheh. Fuck you guise, srsly. And then the capper:

"A genuine free market requires restrictions on the ability of predator multinationals to create monopolies."

That's a lot of derp in one sentence. In what sense is this a political question:

"It's natural for children to keep some secrets from their parents."

Sub-Cosmopolitan Magazine caliber. These are the people that will be running the country. Or what's left of it. It's part of a a bigger effort to pervert American libertarianism, of course, along with the movement to paint all anarchism as communist. 

"Abstract art that doesn't represent anything shouldn't be considered art at all."

Put the fucking bong down, guys. This has nothing to do with political viewpoints.  Finally, after six pages of this crap, I get this:

You can't even be a libertarian, according to this quiz. Ain't that some shit? There's a page about race, religion, and a entire page devoted to sex. To score high left libertarian, you'd have to answer all of the Social Justice questions correctly, slanted as they are. I refused. To replicate the results of my Nolan Test, well, I'm not even sure how you'd have to answer them.

At any rate, pathetic. We're doomed. Free market economist Milton Friedman Meh, he wasn't very libertarian... 

I'd love to know where they got each of these people's views on race, sex, and religion. Oh, well. Feel the Bern.

Bernie Sanders' Dank Meme Stash